HARD TO DO: THE SURPRISING, FEMINIST HISTORY OF BREAKING UP (Coach House) is a collection of essays that traces how the history of domestic partnership has followed women to today's unprecedented position of romantic liberty, and the historical baggage that makes decisions to partner or break up harder than ever. Via a fun and flirty skip through the last two centuries, Korducki explores how today's newfound freedoms push up against the old relationship models that women who date men have inherited, making breakups fraught — morally, politically, emotionally — and hard to do in ways that run counter to conventional wisdom.
What people are saying about HARD TO DO:
"The study of how relationships have evolved, and how the historically socially-condoned male-female romantic relationship developed and came to dominate in Western culture—is gargantuan in scope... Yet it is one that Kelli María Korducki has pulled off, in a format that could easily be read in one sitting." - Shameless Magazine
"Kelli María Korducki’s Hard To Do is a superbly written ode to a new brand of woman" - The Globe and Mail
"Hard to Do is a tiny gem of a book, both careful and glorious in its revelations." -Quill and Quire
"When did breaking up become so hard to do?" - The Toronto Star
"6 Canadian Books We Can't Wait to Read in May" - CBC Books
"In a culture that demands we couple up, that we pursue romantic love above all other forms, Kelli Maria Korducki boldly steps forward with Hard to Do. Korducki is clear eyed and able to cut through the sentimentality and the fantasy of love to see the real economic and sociological demands that lie just underneath. A book like this reminds you it is possible, and good, to dissent, or at least understand why the pressure to find love is driving you crazy. As it turns out, sometimes the most radical act is the act of saying no." —Jessa Crispin, author of Why I Am Not a Feminist: A Feminist Manifesto and founding Editor-in-chief of Bookslut
"What ever might make someone break up with a good guy? Plenty of things, actually. In Hard to Do, Kelli Korducki grapples with capitalism, patriarchal society, and the historical course of love and marriage as she investigates how women today often find ourselves caught between dueling desires—for love, for security, for the achievement of our own independent ambitions, for a lack of ambivalence—as we navigate romance in a world that hasn't exactly considered what we want to factor very highly into the equation. Merging her own story with keen analysis, Korducki asks what it takes to be true to ourselves now. This book will make you smarter about love, money, and whatever path you choose." —Jen Doll, author of Save the Date: The Occasional Mortifications of a Serial Wedding Guest
"With steady and incisive historical mapping and expertly-deployed wit, Kelli Korducki sheds light on the modern mythological creation of the break-up as a cultural mainstay and offers readers alternative possibilities of how love, independence, and agency might shape our worlds. Though a critical socio-historical text in its own right, Hard To Do is also a map of Korducki's evolving understanding of herself in relation to these myths and in the context of her own life advantages. In this narrative, Korducki accomplishes the rare feat of showing crystalline self-awareness while remaining generous with herself and her readers." —Alana Massey, author of All the Lives I Want: Essays About My Best Friends Who Happen to Be Famous Strangers
"The decision to break out of a decent romantic relationship almost always feels like an act of revolution, especially for women — so why has it never been defined that way? Hard To Do takes an illuminating, fastidious, and humorous look at the acts and facts that conspire to keep us from choosing anything other than the status quo. It's a crucial and compelling inquiry into the alternate definitions of what it means for a woman's life 'work out.'" — Kathryn Borel, Jr., Author of Corked
HARD TO DO is available on Amazon, through Coach House, or at a bookseller near you.